India can seem a realm of utter chaos, a walk to the market is no walk in the park. But whether you're visiting a sari shop or a family home for dinner, there are dozens of rules you might want to follow to avoid the forgiving laughter with which most Westerners are greeted. In a heterogeneous culture, basic rules make sense of the contradictions, especially in the sanctum of the family home.
The Table:
The rules of eating in India depend on whether you're in the north or the south (the traditional meal below is an example of one you might have in the north). One thing remains the same wherever you are: Wash before every meal. Even small street stands usually set aside a bowl of water for this (but bring wipes, since they won't have soap).
How to Eat (The North)
Rice
You can use your right hand, but if you find that too difficult, use a fork and a spoon or a fork and a knife, which is "the old British way." Do not use the whole hand to mash the rice and sauces together (although in the south this is acceptable). Use your left hand only to hold your drink or to pass food.
Chapati
Use ONLY your right hand to handle the chapati. To tear off a piece, use the last three fingers to hold down the larger portion while, with your thumb and forefinger, you turn up the edge and tear by pressing the forefinger down and the thumb up and inward.
Maacher Jhol (fish curry)
You're going to want to alternate bites of fish and rice. Remove the bones from the fish as best you can with your right hand. If you get any in your mouth, try to remove them several at a time instead of one after another.
Rogan Josh (lamb curry)
Tear the meat from the bone with your hand, but use AS FEW FINGERS AS POSSIBLE. "In the north, you tend to use just the final digits of your hand," says Jaffrey. Then, with your thumb and forefinger, fold a small piece of chapati over a piece of meat to create a little sandwich.
Water or Lassi
This is generally all you'll get, beverage-wise. Alcohol is not drunk with a traditional meal, but feel free to bring beer or whiskey to dinner if you know the family drinks.
How to Eat (The South)
In traditional households throughout the south, it's common to sit on a very low stool with the food on the floor before you. You must bend over deeply to eat, and the doubled-up posture is thought to help you get fuller faster. There's a general order to eating in the south: The meal begins with a bit of sweetness, proceeds through the rice dishes, and concludes with the more savory ones. Note, too, that meat will not always be served in the south (It is estimated that 30 percent of southerners are vegetarians). And no matter where you are in India, don't ask for beef (which is not eaten by Hindus) or pork (which is not eaten by Muslims) if they are not on the menu.
Rice and Ghee
Lighter food comes first, so for the first course you'll be pouring purified butter over your rice and eating clumps of it mixed with vegetables or dal with your fingers.
Dal
This usually comes either in little tin cups or, if it has a denser consistency, in little dollops on a banana leaf. It's your job to mash it all together, moving your fingers inward and outward to mix the rice in. Once you've achieved a claylike consistency, start rolling it back and forth with your fingers to form a ball. If it stays together, just pop it into your mouth. If it's soupy, use your hand as a scooper, pushing the mixture into your mouth with your thumb.
Vegetables and Curries
You'll be mixing these with the rice and eating them much as you ate the dal. Drop the vegetables into the ice first.
Dhosa, Puri, Fried Foods, Pickles, and Chutneys
Eat these with your right hand, using a piece of chapati to scoop up some of the chutneys and pickles.
Pappadam and Yogurt
You'll eat these last. Crush and sprinkle the pappadam onto your rice-curry mixture and eat with your hand.
When You're Done
In some areas, if you fold the banana leaf toward you when you've finished eating, this indicates that you liked the meal, whereas if you fold it away from you, it means you're dissatisfied. If you don't want any more food, simply cover your plate and say "bas."
Simple Rules for Being in the Street
There's nothing like a walk down a busy, bazaar-filled Indian street to give you a real sense of the country in all its glorious diversity. Here's how to maximize your experience and ensure a warm reception
Dress Modestly
Keep your shoulders covered at all times. This especially applies to women, who should also wear below-the-knee skirts except when going to a private home or a bar and taking a car the entire way.
Wear Sandals
Sneakers mark you as a tourist, and sandals are easy to take off, which you'll have to do to enter a religious institution or a home. Minders will watch your shoes, but don't wear any you can't bear to lose.
Haggle Within Reason
It's expected, particularly at outdoor markets. Start by declaring that you'll pay half the price, but don't go overboard; if the difference is 50 cents, cough it up. Walking away is not an insulting tactic.
Negotiate Prices First
This especially goes for cabs and rickshaws. Sometimes it helps to make it a show of writing down the price in a notebook, so the driver will know you have a record of the promised fee.
Eat Their Snacks
Very often, you'll be offered a biscuit and a cup of tea upon entering a shop. At least take a bite or a sip. If you're afraid of the water, just make a sipping motion.
Text, Don't Call
Most small businesses run on cell phones. Text first, you may shock a business by calling.
Eat the Street Food
Don't let it scare you. Be sure that the food is freshly made, though a large crowd ensures high turnover and beware of water-based dishes in monsoon season.
Greet Elders with "Namaste"
If it's someone worthy of respect, say "Namaste," bringing your hands together as if praying and quickly bowing your head with shoulders slightly hunched.
Keep Your Body Language Open
Too often, tourists wear a guarded expression, thinking this protects them, it doesn't. Instead, have a sense of humor, smile and say hello, and keep calm.
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